Very true. I have consciously changed one of those "main" rooms I used to live in and my life has changed for the better. Once outside that toxic environment, my body felt different. It healed.
However, knowing that a doctor has writen this, and me working very closely with physicians, i can't help but see how little physicians themselves pay attention to the atmosphere they live in, how it affects their well being, how the are wired to endure whatever room they are placed in.
Irene, this is such a good point. I wasn’t thinking about how it applied to me and my colleagues, and you’re absolutely right.
Physicians are often trained to endure the room, not examine what it’s doing to us. That culture of endurance can look noble from the outside, but over time it can quietly reshape the body, the mind, and the way care is delivered.
I love how you put this. Sometimes healing begins when we finally notice the atmosphere we’ve been surviving in. Or suffering through. I wonder is some people see only one side of that coin.
I think you’re onto something. We spend a lot of time talking about how physicians care for patients, and not nearly enough time talking about what the environment of modern medicine does to the physicians themselves. That’s a conversation worth having.
This made me think about how often we treat health as an individual achievement instead of an ecosystem. “A prescription does not land in a vacuum." Neither does healing. It lands inside relationships, financial stress, old coping patterns, nervous systems, kitchens, text threads, silence. The room matters more than we admit. And the line about noticing how people feel in your body after they leave… whew. That’s the kind of wisdom most of us only learn after ignoring it for years.
A lot of this resonates with me as well. I will share. So many of my friendships have been changing these last few years — some have gone by the wayside but also circumstances have brought in some healthier attitudes. I’m both grieving the loss and welcoming the possibilities. It’s interesting.
This article is wonderful and so validating to the choices I've made for many years. Thank you for writing it! It's especially timely at this point in our collective consciousness, as more of us are consciously updating our agreements with ourselves and others.
I forwarded this to a few people in my life who I appreciate for the energy and awareness they bring. Thanks again.
I have one person around me twenty four seven. My husband. He’s in stage 6 dementia Alzheimer’s. That’s it. No one comes to visit. Most tell me they are uncomfortable and don’t know what to say or how to act around hubby. My neighbor told me she was too scared to see hubs and apologized. Said her grandpa died of Alzheimer’s and it scared her.
It does get lonely because I can no longer converse with hubby. He can’t articulate what he needs, nor can he understand what I’m saying.
He has five kids. They live near by, they call and stop by on occasion, but can never stay more than five minutes. It’s hard for them to see dad like this.
I’m glad no one comes around. At first it bothered me. Now, I just go with the flow.
Hopefully God will bring him home sooner than later. End the suffering.
I think then.. I begin my next journey alone… no people needed. Just me… finally free and able to individuate. Find myself. I’m looking forward to it.
Very true. I have consciously changed one of those "main" rooms I used to live in and my life has changed for the better. Once outside that toxic environment, my body felt different. It healed.
However, knowing that a doctor has writen this, and me working very closely with physicians, i can't help but see how little physicians themselves pay attention to the atmosphere they live in, how it affects their well being, how the are wired to endure whatever room they are placed in.
Irene, this is such a good point. I wasn’t thinking about how it applied to me and my colleagues, and you’re absolutely right.
Physicians are often trained to endure the room, not examine what it’s doing to us. That culture of endurance can look noble from the outside, but over time it can quietly reshape the body, the mind, and the way care is delivered.
I love how you put this. Sometimes healing begins when we finally notice the atmosphere we’ve been surviving in. Or suffering through. I wonder is some people see only one side of that coin.
Thanks for your reply, Dr Caplan.
Exactly.
That is why my substack is all about helping physicians see what it is happening in that room and how it affects them. :)
Little is said or done to care for our caregivers. And it is a global phenomen.
I think you’re onto something. We spend a lot of time talking about how physicians care for patients, and not nearly enough time talking about what the environment of modern medicine does to the physicians themselves. That’s a conversation worth having.
This made me think about how often we treat health as an individual achievement instead of an ecosystem. “A prescription does not land in a vacuum." Neither does healing. It lands inside relationships, financial stress, old coping patterns, nervous systems, kitchens, text threads, silence. The room matters more than we admit. And the line about noticing how people feel in your body after they leave… whew. That’s the kind of wisdom most of us only learn after ignoring it for years.
Brilliant observation, as to whether the threads we keep with others, become part of a greater fabric or not. That metaphor really hits Home.🌹
Or is the atmosphere a reflection of what’s inside?
A lot of this resonates with me as well. I will share. So many of my friendships have been changing these last few years — some have gone by the wayside but also circumstances have brought in some healthier attitudes. I’m both grieving the loss and welcoming the possibilities. It’s interesting.
This article is wonderful and so validating to the choices I've made for many years. Thank you for writing it! It's especially timely at this point in our collective consciousness, as more of us are consciously updating our agreements with ourselves and others.
I forwarded this to a few people in my life who I appreciate for the energy and awareness they bring. Thanks again.
I have one person around me twenty four seven. My husband. He’s in stage 6 dementia Alzheimer’s. That’s it. No one comes to visit. Most tell me they are uncomfortable and don’t know what to say or how to act around hubby. My neighbor told me she was too scared to see hubs and apologized. Said her grandpa died of Alzheimer’s and it scared her.
It does get lonely because I can no longer converse with hubby. He can’t articulate what he needs, nor can he understand what I’m saying.
He has five kids. They live near by, they call and stop by on occasion, but can never stay more than five minutes. It’s hard for them to see dad like this.
I’m glad no one comes around. At first it bothered me. Now, I just go with the flow.
Hopefully God will bring him home sooner than later. End the suffering.
I think then.. I begin my next journey alone… no people needed. Just me… finally free and able to individuate. Find myself. I’m looking forward to it.
I hear you.
I resonate with this so deeply. Thank you